The Lovely Dragons

My story begins at home. I am in the front garden when a fantastical episode occurs: colourful dragons start landing in the field not far from me. They have incredible, vivid colours. At first I am amazed that nobody else seems to have witnessed such a spectacular event, but I quickly get over it and rush to see the dragons up close.

Without any obvious health and safety assessment I climb aboard one of the dragons, who luckily doesn't seem to mind, and we whizz off on a wonderful airborne adventure. They seemed friendly.

On my return I tell my parents of the marvellous event, but they don't seem too interested. I insist that what has happened was real and go to get my new dragon friends to show them.

All the while there is a dreamy uncertainty behind my eyes.

The fun continues around the house and around the houses of my family as I show off my new friends, but something just doesn't feel right.

My parents bring my world crashing down when they tell me that the dragons are not real, despite the fact I have brought my new friends home with me many times. They get quite angry with me as I insist their games are not amusing. They ask me to think seriously about what I am doing.

I think back about my adventures and have flashbacks of dragon-shaped balloons. I am deeply confused, and worried. It becomes clear quite quickly that I have had a psychotic episode. This realisation reminds me that this is not the first time and I accept that my dragons are not real, along with some other fantastical happenings that had occurred.

On my way to school the yards were eerily quiet. I met a friend outside who also had had similar problems to myself on a number of occasions. We entered the school to see that today was exam day and neither of us knew anything about it. I experienced more confusion as I did not understand how I could have forgotten about the exams, but I did not panic and assumed that the school could take what had happened to the two of us into account.

Fast forward to myself and my friend, my parents and her parents all sat outside of the reception at my school waiting for someone to come and see us. It was clear that my father was aggravated by having to deal with me again. My friend and I kicked a ball back and forth to pass the time.

At this time her parents dropped the news that she was to go back to Mexico and leave the United States for good [my school was in England]. She did not take the news well. I too would be leaving the U.S. back for England but I was happy to leave and get back home.

She sat with me and we started talking. Her parents had explained to her that due to her disability it simply wasn't reasonable for her to be taught at a regular school. I felt that they were directing this information toward me also. Their tone suggested that my friend and I had some sort of speech problem and others struggled to understand us. However, neither our parents nor each other had any trouble communicating. She was clearly upset. I told her that no matter what they say I have no trouble at all talking to and understanding her. I began to question this information: neither of us appeared to be experiencing any problems. I thought back again, as I did with the dragons, to try and remember the reality of the situation, but I seemed to be inventing a speech problem that my friend had which I was sure did not exist before I invented it. A distrust of what people were saying had set in. She was the only one I could trust.

I made my excuses and went to the toilet where I was convinced I would be able to hear people talking about us, which would offer a clue as to what was going on.

I sat, thinking about everything I had been told. I was certain the dragons weren't real but everything else I had been told didn't make any sense. I thought about it further and realised that I was way too old to still be in school - why are people trying to convince me otherwise?

I then heard two school friends enter the toilet. I knew them. They thought it would be funny to lean over the cubicle and take pictures while I was sat on the potty. This angered me greatly and I grabbed their phones and threw them out of the door, smashing them. Unfortunately they were not broken and the phones were reassembled and they tried it again. I grabbed them again and threw it at them this time, hitting one in the head. They went outside of the toilet to wait for me.

I waited in the toilet wondering what was going on. Although they are both known for such stupid pranks I started wondering if they were filming me so that "they" knew where I was. I peaked outside to see if they were still waiting. They were. For some reason one of them had blacked himself up. I really don't know why. I also realised that I was now in a supermarket.

I found two tins on the toilet floor so I grabbed one and threw it at the two and managed to hit one of them in the head again. They stayed where they were as they could see I had a second tin in my hand.

The commotion got the attention of a security guard, who looked like Omar Epps. He could see I was in trouble and seemed genuinely concerned for my welfare. Trusting him I threw the second tin at the two waiting for me and darted for the exit, knowing he would detain them and let me escape.

I was now in a large shopping centre. I, again, doubted my surroundings; confused as to why I was here or where I was. I started to walk around hoping to find clues as to what was going on, and even tried to find out what the correct date was. I was still convinced that it was many years later than I had been led to believe.

I found a small solicitor "shop", very much like the gold purchasing shops that have appeared in shopping centres in recent times, apparently an ambulance chaser, and I walked inside. I asked the solicitor for help and tried to hurriedly explain the whole situation as I was acutely aware that people were looking for me. He told me to calm down, raising his left hand, and was clearly doing something with under the desk with his right hand as his eyes wandered around the outside looking for someone. It was obvious he was making someone aware of my presence. I left quickly.

And then I woke up.

But what does it all mean?

My Doggy and the Café

I knew I was late for work but it didn't matter as I was the boss: I knew the staff would be there getting things ready. I was also aware that my help is still needed to get things running, such as bringing fresh stock.

I picked up the dog lead and put it around my lovely doggy's neck and we proceeded to the first café.

She was such a well behaved dog that I knew I could safely walk her all the way.

We arrived at the first café where I greeted the staff and asked if there was anything they needed help with. I put Gypsy (my doggy) out the back out of the way and prepared the chicken for the day (after washing my hands thoroughly). Once done I took a list of what was needed, grabbed Gypsy and proceeded to the next café.

I didn't get her on the lead fast enough so she wandered off into the street. She may have been well behaved but that doesn't mean she was particularly bright. I had to retrieve her from the road and put her back on her lead.

I picked up some of the supplies from the local shop that I knew was needed and continued on to the next café.

Once there I dropped the supplies off but kept Gypsy with me as they didn't really need my help, although I did inspect the kitchens.

I then left.

My unconscious mind struggled to remember if we owned any other cafés, although I was pretty sure that we did.

But what does it all mean?

Scumbags

This dream began in a ran-down area that oddly reminded me of Peterlee town centre in its layout. There were a bunch of "youths" (teenagers) hanging around on the first level (my family and I being on the ground level) being a general nuisance. Think London.

I don't know why we were there but I was with +Julie Thornton, +Graeme Thornton and Julie's boyfriend (I do think of you sometimes, although involuntarily).

There was a continuous din and commotion and Julie decided to climb the steps to mock these Neanderthals. That's the kind of thing she would do.

A few minutes later an adult male turned up to have a go at these imbeciles. He appeared to be the father of a young boy whom they had been picking on. In a typical fashion they beat the crap out of him and he walked away with cuts about his face.

Julie decided to continue up the stairs to confront them. She vanished.

Shortly after this Graeme followed her up, and then Julie's boyfriend. They vanished. I believe they had chosen a different stairway to take them by surprise.

The little boy who had been pestered by the simpletons turned up in tears and I went to see if he was okay, leaving behind all our valuables - it's okay though, it seems like a nice area.

While talking to the boy I felt a blow to my back. I turned around to see a scrote looking at me with a general confused look on his face. He looked as if he really didn't want to hit me, but that he had little choice.

Before I had chance to think another ballbag grabbed me around the neck, holding his head towards mine (this is the kind of thing brainless dicks do in the UK). I was aware of another rat holding on to me from behind, though I was also aware that it was not the first scrote. I was also fully aware that I had internal organs and scum carry knives.

I grabbed Dumbarse by his head and pushed it back while he struggled to keep his head attached to mine, fully aware that this could damage his neck and fully hoping that it did. I was thinking a few steps ahead about how and who I was planning to hurt at this point, but then I woke up.

But what does it all mean?

The naked soldier

I had been accepted into the Army as a much younger, slimmer man. The training barracks where more like a school/college though and we even had lecturers.

I remember meeting my Sergeant a few times, and even the Lieutenant and possibly a Captain or a Major in his office, for normal things and to be asked if I would like to take part in something. I cannot remember what it was though I did agree. It may have been to attend a school/college!

My mind kept wandering in the one lecture I appeared to attend as she seemed to be waffling on about nothing. It was probably an English literature class as it had that sort of feel.

My touch screen computer was playing silly buggers at one point and she called for the "Computer Sergeant", which I hope I have made up.

The major recurring theme seemed to be that other than my satchel (something I have never owned), I was always naked when not in uniform, wandering the halls. Nobody seemed to mind, and some people even seemed to like this, which is definitely wishful thinking. It was all well groomed.

After a long, naked day I returned to my home where it appeared I was living with a friend. Another friend turned up, I don't know why she would, and one thing led to another. While I was desperately trying to get some sleep, but couldn't, they were desperately trying to create a new land-speed-sex record in another room. I'm quite disappointed I was not invited. This saddens me. He was making very odd noises indeed which both upset and entertained me. I have never heard him actually make noises like this, nor any normal human except on terrible American porn movies.

I eventually gave up and just wandered around the flat, naked again, obviously, wasting time, fully aware that I need my sleep because I'm in the military now! It was about 05:00 as I recall. It was very hot and very humid.

But what does it all mean?

Hiding from the boss

I arrived at a place I used to work and started walking through the factory as a short-cut to where I wanted to be. I was not wearing the necessary safety equipment so I was trying to get through as quickly as possible.

Part way through my old boss caught me and showed me to another supervisor, who then showed me what I would be doing that day. It was at this point that I remembered that I do actually work here and the bosses didn't bother trying to find out where I had been all this time.

I was wearing my "decent" clothes so I was concerned about them being ruined.  Nonetheless I got on with my job, as jobs are rare these days, which seemed to involve bending metal for no particularly obvious reason.

I got bored of that and the next thing I knew I was on my motorbike in the car park. Only the front of the building was no longer a factory, more of a hotel lobby.

I saw my boss, and the other chap, coming out of the building so I hid so that he wouldn't see that I was skiving. I started my bike, which isn't a quiet animal, and rode it out of the car park past the bosses, in the hope they wouldn't see me.

I had originally had a plan but I cannot remember what it was. This work lark was a nuisance that got in the way.

I returned to the car park, making sure to take the back entrance, with some yummy food. I then returned to my job and continued as if nothing had happened.

Then I woke up, perplexed.

But what does it all mean?

Bank Robbery

I'll start by pointing out that I have been unable to sleep for a number of days (three?) and so passed out this afternoon for around five hours. Despite needing a full 24 hours to recover some people think it's more fun to interrupt my much needed rest. Anyway....

The dream begins with me robbing expensive items from a bank. I note to myself that this isn't a wonderful bank as it is about the size of a Portakabin with similar security.

I make a point of smashing open the box for the surveillance tapes and removing their contents, wiping my fingerprints down as I go. I removed VHS, laser disc and a Betamax tape.

The panic sets in a bit as I am aware we need to make our escape quickly or someone may hear us.

It's too late.

Someone starts making their way inside the Portakabin so I grab a metal bar with the intent of knocking the guy out. As I swing I realise that the bar is a bit too heavy to be smashing over people's heads so I stop myself, as I really don't want to kill the poor chap. I simply tell the guy to keep his trap shut and we leave.

And then I was rudely awakened.

But what does it all mean?

Bouncers

The memory of this dream seems to fade in while myself and two friends are in quite a disgracefully drunk manner in Leeds, an eternally joyous occasion.

We attempt to enter a number of night clubs but are turned down by bouncers as there are "too many of [you]". This is a real thing: they really do say stupid shit like this.

Eventually giving up before the veins in the sides of our heads explode, we decide to go to a supermarket and buy our own booze to take back to the hotel.

My two friends enter first but I am stopped by a bouncer at the supermarket‽ He tells me that, "there are too many of you". This was normal back at school for small shops as you cannot trust a child not to steal from you.

"Okay," I said, "I'll wait."

"No," came his reply, "There are too many of you."

I tried to reason with the oaf but he insisted we couldn't get served because there were three of us, despite the fact there were only two in the shop. My friends tried buying non-alcoholic drinks instead and he was still being a tool.

I'm angered by his stupidity, but this is just a dream.

But what does it all mean?